RABBIT: The word TRY is another word for fail. Trying leaves open justifications to fail. Why would we leave a justification to fail when we want something so badly? It seems self-defeating but it is really just a way to remain consistent with the comfortable way things are. I made a commitment to stop smoking yesterday but when I came to midnight of today, the day I said I would quit, I noticed how I left the loophole of time open so I could smoke until midnight this evening and still accomplish my goal but sadly this loophole was only a creative way to lie to myself and allow me to continue smoking. Even though I have a picture in my mind of me being free of cigarettes it still had backdoors that allowed me to escape from making the change.
Read the rest of the post on the official Alpha Blade blog here.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Thursday, August 7, 2008
My weight loss begins
Around 3-4 weeks ago when my fiance left me I decided to weigh myself. I was 109 kilograms, the heaviest I have ever been.
One of my goals on the Alpha Blade program is to lose weight, gain muscle, and become healthy again.
I am now achieving this goal. Over the past few weeks I have been trying to eat healthy again and started to do a little bit of exercise. So far I have lost 6.1 kilograms and I weigh 102.9 kilograms.
My goal weight is around 80kg lean or 87kg with good muscle definition. With my focus in the Alpha Blade mindset I know I can achieve this goal.
One of my goals on the Alpha Blade program is to lose weight, gain muscle, and become healthy again.
I am now achieving this goal. Over the past few weeks I have been trying to eat healthy again and started to do a little bit of exercise. So far I have lost 6.1 kilograms and I weigh 102.9 kilograms.
My goal weight is around 80kg lean or 87kg with good muscle definition. With my focus in the Alpha Blade mindset I know I can achieve this goal.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
The Optimist's Creed
Promise Yourself
To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet.
To make all your friends feel that there is something in them.
To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.
To think only of the best, and expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.
To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile.
To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
C.D. Larson
To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet.
To make all your friends feel that there is something in them.
To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.
To think only of the best, and expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.
To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile.
To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
C.D. Larson
Meditation for focusing
I began meditating last week for relaxation and focusing. I have only been meditating for 30 minutes a day but already it is making me feel like a new person.
From today I have also started meditating while also saying the Alpha Blade Mantra "I am eternal and infinite, Loving and strong, I am perfect in all ways, I am the creator of my universe".
This has given me one of the best feelings of meditation so far and is giving me an even more positive outlook on the future.
I will post more of my journey soon.
From today I have also started meditating while also saying the Alpha Blade Mantra "I am eternal and infinite, Loving and strong, I am perfect in all ways, I am the creator of my universe".
This has given me one of the best feelings of meditation so far and is giving me an even more positive outlook on the future.
I will post more of my journey soon.
I am what you say I am
RABBIT: I have always believed that the only way a person could mentally diagnose another person is by being in the same mental state as the patient. Now, even if a doctor is a person suffering with OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) [or any other mental illness] and treats a patient with the same diagnosis there is still a major flaw in determining diagnosis because an original diagnosis would have had to be made on the doctor before he could deem himself an obsessive compulsive and that diagnosis was from another doctor. The loop is endless in a game of "who came first? the chicken or the egg?" but this story comes with a lesson.
Read the rest of this post at the official Alpha Blade blog here.
Read the rest of this post at the official Alpha Blade blog here.
Yesterday and Today
FOX Yesterday: Just over a year ago I had everything I wanted. I had a good high paying job, I had the girl of my dreams, I had my health, and I was in a very happy place with everything(or so i thought).
FOX TODAY: All of a sudden I got hit with "depression". I don't know how it came about but I felt like I was losing my mind and going insane for no reason at all. The doctors first prescribed me Lexapro for the depression and at first I thought "yes, this is working, i'm fine" etc. However my depression actually became worse and my anxiety increased greatly.
RABBIT Always: I went from one moment to the next in these paragraphs and I will able to see only a very short space. I realized that you could have been referring to a span of 2 days or 2 decades. My point is that once we take time completely out of the equation we are left with a very short, or long, distance between two points.
Read the rest on the official Alpha Blade blog here.
FOX TODAY: All of a sudden I got hit with "depression". I don't know how it came about but I felt like I was losing my mind and going insane for no reason at all. The doctors first prescribed me Lexapro for the depression and at first I thought "yes, this is working, i'm fine" etc. However my depression actually became worse and my anxiety increased greatly.
RABBIT Always: I went from one moment to the next in these paragraphs and I will able to see only a very short space. I realized that you could have been referring to a span of 2 days or 2 decades. My point is that once we take time completely out of the equation we are left with a very short, or long, distance between two points.
Read the rest on the official Alpha Blade blog here.
The Rabbit's Nose
"FOX: "Just over a year ago I had everything I wanted. I had a good high paying job, I had the girl of my dreams, I had my health, and I was in a very happy place with everything(or so i thought)."
RABBIT: Time is a very strange thing, in one moments we see a beautiful picture and the next time we look it appears ugly. Success would be only a reflection of making each moment as close to the original moment of perfection we have perceived in experience. "
Read the rest at the official Alpha Blade blog here.
Read the rest at the official Alpha Blade blog here.
Starting the Alpha Blade Program
Here is a snippet of what Rabbit(aka Mike) had to say about the start of my journey on the Alpha Blade program.
"Hey FOX,
Thanks for sending me your story and I am happy to see that you are taking part in the ALPHA BLADE processes. After reading your letter I was able to see that you are very much like many who are in your position, very close to a breakthrough but so shadowed by the darkness of the present you find it difficult to see. Unlike many, you recognize that thing ending is very close and in taking part in the Alpha Blade program I know that you realize the work END really means BEGINNING."
You can read the rest of this post on the Alpha Blade blog here.
You can read the rest of this post on the Alpha Blade blog here.
Welcome to my journey.
Hi, and welcome to my journey on the Alpha Blade body+spirit+mind program.
My name is Fox and here is my story:
Just over a year ago, my life was amazing. I had a good high paying job, I had the girl of my dreams, I was healthy, and I believed everything was going great.
All of a sudden I had a lot of depressive feelings, I couldn't sleep at night, I would cry for no reason at all, and I truly felt as if I was going insane. I also had no idea why all of this came about.
Anyway, I decided to see a doctor about this and I told them my story. The doctor told me I had 'depression' and prescribed me the drug Lexapro. At first I thought "great, i know what is wrong with me know, i'm depressed, but the drugs will help". Oh how I was wrong.
My 'depression' increased after I knew that i was 'depressed' and so I went back to the doctors again and they prescribed me an even larger dose of Lexapro and then eventually also prescribed me a larger than normal dose of Xanax. At this time I was diagnosed with "Severe Depression with Anxiety Disorder" or something very similar along those lines.
This medication completely changed who I was. I was like a zombie in an empty shell. I had no feelings towards anything. I ended up losing a high paying job because I just didn't care. I ended up putting on lot's of weight. I ended up getting into more debt. My fiance and I lost the house that we were going to build together. Our wedding got cancelled. I ended up not caring about my fiance and I started to treat her very badly. She decided to cheat on me because I just wasn't the same person anymore. My life was falling apart while I was on this medication, and I didn't even care.
One day I just decided that I can't take it anymore and that I cannot cope with what the medication is doing to me. I decided to stop taking all of my medication. For the first week I was fine, then all of a sudden I had extremely bad side effects from stopping so quickly. I would be walking through the shops or down the street and I would feel a sharp "electric shock" go all the way from my toes up into the top of my head and I would nearly faint. This happened for a good 2-3 weeks and made me feel like crap. Another side effect of stopping the medication was that it made me suffer in the bedroom. I couldn't last as long with my fiance and I also didn't care. It was terrible.
Anyway, since all of this happened I stayed bitter because of the cheating and also because of my 'depression'. I stayed that way for another 6-7 months and it ruined me. 3-4 weeks ago my fiance and I broke up. I believe losing her was just the wake up call that I have needed to make me change my ways and start my head and heart off fresh.
My goals on the Alpha Blade body+spirit+mind program are:
I have decided that I am going to start my own successful business.
I have decided that I am going to be healthy and fit again.
I have decided that I am going to build or buy a nice house.
I have decided that I will find love again, hopefully with my fiance, but if not, then with someone who will appreciate me for who I am in all ways.
Most of all, I am going to live a good life.
My name is Fox and here is my story:
Just over a year ago, my life was amazing. I had a good high paying job, I had the girl of my dreams, I was healthy, and I believed everything was going great.
All of a sudden I had a lot of depressive feelings, I couldn't sleep at night, I would cry for no reason at all, and I truly felt as if I was going insane. I also had no idea why all of this came about.
Anyway, I decided to see a doctor about this and I told them my story. The doctor told me I had 'depression' and prescribed me the drug Lexapro. At first I thought "great, i know what is wrong with me know, i'm depressed, but the drugs will help". Oh how I was wrong.
My 'depression' increased after I knew that i was 'depressed' and so I went back to the doctors again and they prescribed me an even larger dose of Lexapro and then eventually also prescribed me a larger than normal dose of Xanax. At this time I was diagnosed with "Severe Depression with Anxiety Disorder" or something very similar along those lines.
This medication completely changed who I was. I was like a zombie in an empty shell. I had no feelings towards anything. I ended up losing a high paying job because I just didn't care. I ended up putting on lot's of weight. I ended up getting into more debt. My fiance and I lost the house that we were going to build together. Our wedding got cancelled. I ended up not caring about my fiance and I started to treat her very badly. She decided to cheat on me because I just wasn't the same person anymore. My life was falling apart while I was on this medication, and I didn't even care.
One day I just decided that I can't take it anymore and that I cannot cope with what the medication is doing to me. I decided to stop taking all of my medication. For the first week I was fine, then all of a sudden I had extremely bad side effects from stopping so quickly. I would be walking through the shops or down the street and I would feel a sharp "electric shock" go all the way from my toes up into the top of my head and I would nearly faint. This happened for a good 2-3 weeks and made me feel like crap. Another side effect of stopping the medication was that it made me suffer in the bedroom. I couldn't last as long with my fiance and I also didn't care. It was terrible.
Anyway, since all of this happened I stayed bitter because of the cheating and also because of my 'depression'. I stayed that way for another 6-7 months and it ruined me. 3-4 weeks ago my fiance and I broke up. I believe losing her was just the wake up call that I have needed to make me change my ways and start my head and heart off fresh.
My goals on the Alpha Blade body+spirit+mind program are:
I have decided that I am going to start my own successful business.
I have decided that I am going to be healthy and fit again.
I have decided that I am going to build or buy a nice house.
I have decided that I will find love again, hopefully with my fiance, but if not, then with someone who will appreciate me for who I am in all ways.
Most of all, I am going to live a good life.
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